go ahead

i've been such a concert junkie since my sister took me to a go ahead concert when i was in seventh grade. we'd gone to the backstreet boy's black and blue concert when they came to the tacoma dome... it was my first concert ever, and while it was amazing, it was nothing compared to the rush of being crammed into my first mosh pit and watching sweat roll off all the band members.
it was amazing.
thanks to tony d'angelo, i was never the same.
sure, that concert was at a middle of nowhere venue, and only about fifty people showed up, but after that i hardly ever missed a go ahead concert.
i was hooked. whenever i heard the first few notes of 'supposedly' being plunked out, my heart raced, because all of a sudden all the stupid jr. high stereotypes, all the drama, all stupid private-school cliques washed away. i knew that everyone around me knew all the words to all the song just like me.

go ahead blew up, and i was suddenly one of hundreds of thousands of screaming teenage fans who showed up to skeezy venues all over the seattle/tacoma are for a show. i got hooked onto other bands like pistol for a paycheck, jupiter sunrise, ghost runner on third... daphne loves derby, truce, sub motive, the geeks.... there were more, but most of the names have escaped my memory since they've broken up.
but jesus.
i remember going to concerts on the weekends like there was nothing else to live for.

i still remember every single word to every single song... they're all engraved in my brain more deep than any math equation or nasty rumor. i remember finally selling merch. i remember the handful of pop-punk show-goers like myself asking me to introduce them to tony d'angelo, who, by the middle of high school, was something like a local band god (though my current boyfriend will tell you otherwise)..and i remember being absolutely cool for doing that.
and it built up.
and i belonged to something
something
that was far above all the drama and all the labels and all the private school high school bullshit i went through on a daily basis.


it's been years since my first concert, and i'm a little sad to look back and realize i've done myself no justice in the concert-going department. i wasn't too hurt to miss no doubt and paramore last weekend with all the current crises at hand... but i think the last band i saw was natalie portman's shaved head back in... december? this year's been a trip so far, and while i wish i could say i've seen more, i'm not too disappointed with myself.
besides.
i still have my original go ahead hoodie
and go ahead's first cd
which was probably made in someone's basement.
these things are priceless... if anything for the memories they hold, right?

ps. hope you enjoy all the crappy quality videos linked to my youth:

xoholly